Synopsis:
Tom returns to his hometown on the
tenth anniversary of the Valentine's night massacre that claimed the lives of 22
people. Instead of a homecoming, however, Tom finds himself suspected of
committing the murders, and it seems like his old flame is the only one will
believes he's innocent.
The Freak's
Rating: D- :
The opening (10 min) of My Bloody Valentine is
very well done. A newspaper and news
recording collage overlay one another as we're
informed of the basis for the film in a few
short minutes of screen time. Soon after
we are thrust into a scene that plays as if it
is the final scene of a horror film, not the
first. Sadly, that is where everything
drops off.
Kerr
Smith, the one notable star of the film, is
still attempting to escape his gay character
stereotype from Dawson's Creek, this time quite
annoyingly as the town's sheriff who had an
encounter with the killer the first time around
and will now have to try to defeat him.
The lack of any star power is notable and a
clear mistake by the casting director. We
always need at least a hot chick who will run
half naked, trip over everything and at some
point hide in a closet/under a bed/around a
corner holding her hands over her own face soas
to not make a sound. If you're going to do
a stereotypical film, you must give us the
stereotypical hottie (ala Jessica Biel in Texas
Chainsaw Massacre) and they don't provide here.
The
film is unoriginal and laughable in parts.
I spoke with my wife just after watching it.
We had a conversation I'd encourage all couples
to have at some point in their lives. I
informed her that if some day she sees me
beheaded by a killer, please run away quickly.
Do not stare at the event and become emotional,
just run! That could be the most annoying
thing horror movies show, so hopefully should we
encounter danger she'll now know what to do :).
Violence is carried out in a horrific style with
victims shred apart, something a pick axe can't
accomplish (but lets not look for realism,
right?). The first 10 minutes save it from
a complete failure, but just barely.
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